To take back control of him
by Ruthyroo
Summary: A Brendan's pov one shot of things i would like to see happen in the show regarding Brendan Ste and Doug in relation to Ste and Doug's new business.


_**To take back control of him**_

_I've been patient; I've waited for an opportunity to present itself, a way to enter his world again and now it has I'm not letting it pass me by, not this time._

_This business they are starting together how could they? They don't have any money – they don't stand a chance! I knew the bank manager would turn them down, I can just imagine Stephen speaking to a bank manager; he'd be worrying, nervous and no doubt playing with his fingers, I miss that. He used to be like that with me sometimes, all that seems so long ago now._

_I offered them money, what else could I do? I had no other way to get to him, Stephen refused straight away, I couldn't blame him – not really. I don't even think it was because I was offering the help I think it was because of his morals, he was quite proud really. We're not so different, Stephen and I._

_Maybe it was a bit of both, being too proud to accept help from anyone and the fact that if he did it was from me, his possessive ex and that I would have a hold over him once again._

_I knew that it wasn't going to be easy and to get what I wanted I'd have to get to Douglas. I knew how to do that, I'd had my past experiences with him; I knew how to get him to do the things I wanted, get him on side so to speak. I arranged a meeting with him at the club but of course without Stephen, I had to think about this I didn't want to blow my chances, I had to make Douglas think that I was helping them, that they needed me. This was the only way, the only choice they had. Of course I won him round, I knew I would but even I didn't think he'd agree to all of what I proposed – but he did._

_I had the intention to just let them borrow the money; I knew they'd pay me back eventually. I could hardly believe it when I found myself asking to be their silent partner – that way they'd only have to pay back half the money and id have control over Stephen once more. I made it sound so good, so inviting, like I was doing them the greatest favour. Douglas had one condition for me, I wasn't allowed to tell Stephen about it, I agreed of course. I wasn't going to tell him, not yet anyway. I had to be careful regarding Stephen, it had been so long ago that he cared about me; I knew that it was going to be tough getting him onside._

_I had to think, I had to come up with a plan, I hadn't exactly been nice to him had I? In fact, I'd been nice to everyone except him. But couldn't he see that it was because I still loved him, I was trying to push him away. He left me to rot in that prison, he believed that I could hurt those girls, kill them. I knew I'd hurt him, but he knew me, he knew I'd never hurt a woman. Maybe he just wanted to punish me for all the things I'd done to him. I did tell him I loved him, promised him i'd change, but I didn't, did I? I just let him down again and again like I always did, i'd left it so long to sort things out with him, then I hit him again; how could I go back? I had to wait, I knew my chance would come._

_So I promised to be a silent partner, Douglas knew I would break that promise at some point, but he needed the money, he didn't want to let Stephen down – I could see he thought a lot of him already, I didn't like that, not one bit! But it was my fault; I pushed them together in a way by firing Stephen. I wonder what Stephen will say and do when he finds out that not only did I lend them the money but that I'm also a partner in his business. I would have to be on better terms with him before he found out; I didn't want to ruin my chances with him, not yet anyway. Not before I even had a chance to put things right between us or at least make it a little better._

_I couldn't help but feel smug, here I am again interfering, taking over his life and this time he doesn't even know it! The next few days I watched them getting excited, planning and preparing, I couldn't help but feel a little guilty when I saw how happy Stephen was. I wondered what Douglas had told him and where he said he got the money from; I knew I would have to stay away from them for a while otherwise Stephen would know, he knew what lengths i'd go to, to get him. _

_I should be happy for him but I'm not, I'm going out of my mind without him in my life. So I'm doing the only thing I know how to do, getting involved with his life again, using people to get to him and probably pushing him further away but I don't know what else to do._

_He needs me, he's always needed me and although he'll never admit it, he needed me now. I know that I should just stay away, let him do this on his own, but I couldn't, part of me wanted to, but no matter how hard I tried I just couldn't. I regret firing him that day and doing this kinda rectified that didn't it? But that wasn't the only reason I was doing all this, I was doing this because I wanted him again, I wanted to take back something that has always belonged to me, I couldn't stand him moving on and doing things without me, things that I knew nothing about, I had to know about him, I don't know why, I just did._

_Soon enough he would know, he should know by now the things I'd do for him, why couldn't I be normal and do normal things to get him? I suppose it just wasn't me, I had to do this, it was the only way I could get involved with him again, he might even thank me for it one day. Has he not realised that he will always be my Stephen? I had to do this to take back control, to take back control of him._

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